bookmark_borderApathy

I have no desire whatsoever to work on any of my projects. I have no thoughts about it, no ambition about it, no gumption. I open OpenOffice.org and stare at the blank screen. I sometimes go as far as to even open a document. And I stare at it. Maybe I’ll scroll down a bit but I have no urges to want to write more.

It’s not just limited to Butch Girls. I don’t want to write anything. I am writing this only as an effort to explore possible reasons and maybe even solutions. I’ve let my writing slide recently since I have gotten more involved in CSS and PHP and HTML and all that other acronym soup. I’ve learned a lot but yet am far from being able to do anything outside of the safety of WordPress.

Maybe I can write a scene where 9yr old Lucy instructs thirtysomething yr old Kelly on why she should get a computer. Kelly is a firm believer in ye old encyclopedia and dictionary. I have a really short scene already from the original.

“I need to look something up on the computer.” Lucy closed her book.

“Oh? Like what?” Kelly didn’t look up from the plans she was drawing.

“What the former Yugoslavia had as it’s main agricultural product.”

“Can you get that from an encyclopedia?”

“Well, I guess.”

“Good. They are in those boxes all marked ‘encyclopedia’.” Kelly nodded toward the far wall.

“You don’t have a computer, do you?”

“Nope. Never saw the need.”

“You are a techno-Neanderthal.”

Kelly looked up and grinned. “You’re just mad ’cause you have to open another book. It’s good for you. Builds character.”

Maybe I can expand that some. Wait, do I feel a slight sensation in my brain formerly known as -gasp- creative thought? Nah, must be just the shifting of rocks.

bookmark_borderGetting serious

Well, as serious as I get.

It is almost 4am and I am awake still. Again. I’ll be going to bed soon and try to get some sleep in. When I get up and finish my morning routine (which consists of one syllable sentences), I am going to sit down here and get back to work. My brain is twitching, wanting to tackle the problem. Damn thing is actually eager to untangle the christmas lights that is my plot lines.

It is time for me to blow off the dust and crack my knuckles. I am gonna get this done or else.

bookmark_borderBeing a Wheeler

It’s a long story why I am a wheeler. But to put you through acronym heck: I am a PWD with EDS who uses a PC and a SD to get around. There, that must feel much better.

Anyway, I got friends who are wheelers too. Some of us turn our chairs into mini-RVs. Elena is one of them. All of it is necessary of course. I’ve uploaded her most recent photos of her chair before it was stripped to go to the repair shop.

It’s what we call ‘pimping’ up a chair. Even I do it to some degree. Since I have the good fortune of being able to walk short distances indoors, I don’t need to load up my current chair as bad. Instead, I invested in stickers. I covered up the ‘S-525’ sticker with a decal from HotWheels. And yes, I have been asked if they now make chairs. :rolleyes:

bookmark_borderWriting with a Hacker mentality

As a follow up to the earlier article, I thought I’d ramble on about writing.

Science Fiction is a genre where possibilities are examined. Hard SF is where those possibilities are within the realm of science as we know it. Soft SF is where those possibilities push past the boundaries.

We know that the world is round and that it revolves around the sun and that our moon spins while also revolving around us as we spin and revolve around the sun which is also spinning. aka Orbits. The ‘Pern’ serious by Lackey deals, in part, with orbits. Another planet orbits the same sun as the dragons’ planet. Every once in a while, that planet comes close enough that the organisms on it are able to shoot through space and make it to the ground. Orbit is hard SF. Organisms leaping purposefully into space in order move to another planet, that is soft SF. Lackey is a writing hacker by taking known science and shifting its parameters around. She further hacks away at genetics via the invention of these dragons that like to spit fire at the ‘threads’ (the organisms).

In the fantasy world that contains a country named Valdemar, some of the citizens are born possessing magical gifts that reach the surface of that person at the same time as physical maturity. We know that a lot of things happen to the human body at the time of physical maturity. We also know that there are energy patterns on our own planet. The writer (Lackey again?) hacks those concepts and comes up with a wonderful book series.

E.R. Burroughs and his Tarzan books have led to how many variations on the same them?

The writer of Alice in Wonderland has led to a wide array of books dealing with what can happen with the most simplest of events.

The Brothers Grimm wrote horror, only then it was considered children’s stories. How many books are based on the concept of “Hansel and Gretel”? (think about it)

Writers are hackers. We take an idea in our head and we craft it so that it comes out interesting enough that others would want to read it.

I like that idea. Maybe now I can tell folks that I am a hacker. It is probably more socially accepting than to say I am a writer.

bookmark_borderHacker vs Cracker

PC language has been known as Politically Correct language. However, PC language has another, less known meaning: Personal/Portable Computer language.

There was/is BASIC. get, if, then… simple, to the point.
Somewhere along the line came UNIX. I never got around to learning that one, since I was out of college and no longer had geeks to hang with.

Now there is Open Source. While not a language, it is a term for when anyone using any computer language in any kind of software or process chooses to not keep their code a big secret and instead shows it to the world. Basically.

Growing up in the ’70s and ’80s, we had our ‘nerds’ and ‘geeks’. Now there are also ‘hackers’ and ‘crackers’. I learned today that there is a huge difference between the two. Hackers play with Open Source software by manipulating it to either fix it, change it, personalize it, whatever it. They believe that originality is to be cherished but shared. They believe that the world is round and nothing is ever made brand spanking new. Ideas are based on the ideas of others. If we kept our ideas to ourselves, we would move forward slower each year. Hackers also are not limited to software code. Hackers can be musicians (such as the internet phenom of ‘DJs’ taking existing music and smerging them into a single long piece) and even fiction writers (what else is the fantasy genre but a smerging of existing concepts and dreams?).

Then there are Crackers. Crackers are those that break through security codes and create chaos. Crackers take pride in invading the private space of computers belong to others, ranging from big business to individuals.

According to the How to be a Hacker website, “The basic difference is this: hackers build things, crackers break them.” Much thanks to Dougal for putting up the ‘Hacker’ emblem that showed me the way.

Therefore, based on this principle, I feel that it would be perfectly fine for me to state I am a Hacker. When I was taking production craft classes, my pottery teacher told us (after an incident with alleged style copying) that ‘all pots start out round. what you do with it afterwards is what makes it yours.’ Meaning it is difficult to come up with an idea for pottery style without it coming close to someone elses. What you choose to do with that idea, that style, is what makes it original. Using someone else’s choosing and not your own is not making it your own.

All ideas are round. What you do with your idea is what makes it yours.

bookmark_borderCSS fun

oh joy oh joy how much fun I am having learning CSS

At any rate, a friend recommended I check out a freebie from CoffeeCup Software. The freebie, called CoffeeCup SiteMapper goes through the your folders and spits out a listing of them, depending on the extension of the files. You give it the location of your index.* file and off it goes. I just did up the paulaoffutt.com site, cleaned it up, and viola! There it is.

While at CoffeeCup Software, I downloaded a demo of their stylesheet maker. I played with it some. It is easier to figure out than EasyCSS but I think I like the EasyCSS better. Don’t know why, just do.

However, the same company’s EasySiteMapper is much more difficult to use. It will do the job, but will be raw and ugly.

I think it is time this punkin head went to bed. Last time I was up late and messin’ on the puter, I wound up freaking.

bookmark_borderWhatever for?

Good question.

Why? What? Where?

Writing was so much simplier when I was writing newspaper articles. So what if that was about twenty years ago?

You can’t write fiction the way one does nonfiction. One presents facts – sure they can be fluffed up some, but not without repercussions. The other presents, well, fiction. Stuff that is in the authors head, demanding to be set free. Order vs chaos.

I step over that line into chaos. I present to you, the reader, this bit of string, the beginning of my story. Now, pull on it to have the story pass before you, bit by bit until it says ‘the end’.

The ball of string I’ve labeled Butch Girls is about two thirds unraveled. That’s quite a mess of string you’ve got at your feet. I betcha you’d like for me to begin putting it all together now, huh?

Well, dammit, so would I!!

bookmark_borderAccomplished some things

I got some words in on Butch Girls. Good ones too! I think it is moving along nicely. I was afraid that they were moving too fast so I checked where I’d put it in the original. Would you believe in almost the same place in the timeline??

I transferred some scenes over and edited them. Lucy still asks about her paternal parent. The snow storm is still going to happen.

Speaking of snow…I got a sunburn on Sunday and they are now predicting we’ll get clobbered with snow starting today into Friday. No wonder we are all sick!

bookmark_borderWriting takes many forms

There is poetry, prose, fiction, nonfiction, fantasy, science fiction, free writing, children’s stories, adult stories, erotica, neurotica, horror, suspense, mystery… You get the idea.

Sometimes I feel the urge to just write words. Just let them flow out to see what happens. It is part free writing, part organic. I just added one such thang to the ‘pages’ section you should see in the sidebar‘Storm’.

Keep an eye on the ‘Patterns of Thot’ section.